“I don’t want to die”: Amy Winehouse’s last words just hours before her death…. a death by ‘misadventure’. Amy died from “alcohol toxicity” after drinking way too much.
Winehouse, 27, was found dead at her home in Camden, North London on 23 July 2011, and had been more than five-times the legal drink-drive limit with 416mg of alcohol per 100 millilitres of blood in her system. She was genuinely unwilling to follow the advice of doctors, being someone who wanted to do things her own way. Bitch had a history of alcohol and drug use, including heroine, crack cocaine and cannabis. The dumb bitch had fallen into a pattern of abstaining from drinking and then relapsing.
Amy Winehouse died watching YouTube videos of herself after a vodka binge. A utterly tragic waste, like all alcoholics. What else is there to say? Quality vodka is addictive….lol. A young talented woman who couldn’t beat her demons. She was busy wallowing in self-pity and self indulgence no doubt. Just a accident waiting to happen.
Basically Googling your name + Alcohol = very bad idea. Amy Winehouse and Blake Fielder Civil were like “two speeding trains hurtling towards each other”. Blake introduced her to hard drugs. They seemed hell-bent on destroying each other and didn’t care about dragging others down with them. People spat on Blake after her death. Amy admitted she couldn’t fully quit the booze and would drink “miniatures” every day.
Almost from the moment she arrived on the international pop scene in early 2007, Ms. Winehouse appeared to flirt with self-destruction. She sang of an alcohol-soaked demimonde in songs like “ Rehab ” — whose refrain, “They tried to make me go to rehab/I said, ‘No, no, no,’ ” crystallized Ms. Winehouse’s persona — and before long it seemed to spill over into her personal life and fuel lurid headlines. The notoriety from Ms. Winehouse’s various drug arrests, public meltdowns and ruined concerts overshadowed her talent as a musician, and her career never recovered.
The singer Josh Groban wrote: “Drugs took her gift, her soul, her light, long before they took her life. RIP Amy.”
While the song “Rehab” was still climbing the charts, Ms. Winehouse made headlines for drug binges and arrests that left her hospitalized and forced her to cancel concert dates. She insisted on living the way she wants to without caring what she was doing to herself.
“My parents realized that l was always going to do what l wanted and not worry about the consequences.” -Amy Winehouse.
Girl was self-harming at nine, shoplifting at ten, smoking at twelve and drinking Southern Comfort by fifteen. “I knew in my heart that Amy was angel and devil rolled into one.”-mom Janis. Girl loved to self-harm, cutting her arms and face, stubbing cigarettes out on her cheek and punching a mirror so violently she sliced open her hand. Towards the end of Amy’s life, Janis was forced to watch Amy wither away. Battling bulimia, she only ate scrambled eggs as they were easier to throw up and hadn’t had a period for seven years. With her bones sticking through her knees and missing teeth, Amy died from alcohol poisoning at home in her bed.
When she was growing up she got a nose ring and got her tongue pierced and couldn’t eat for a week. Her success cost her dearly by destroying her health and wellbeing as well as her career. Over-indulgence destroyed her. She would perform in public under the influence and even cancelled shows altogether. Marrying Blake made her worse. Blake was in total DENIAL -“I’m not the bad guy. I love her and she is very precious to me. I wouldn’t let anything happen to her.” – Blake (yeah right). She couldn’t overcome her troubles with him around. She couldn’t break the cycle of self-destruction. Her bulimia and anorexia were the tip of the iceberg. There were also issues to do with self-harming. She once appeared in public with marks on her arms that suggested she had been cutting herself.
During an interview she took a shard of mirror from her handbag and carved Blake’s name across her stomach -in front of a horrified journalist.
She was just nine years old when she picked up a blade and cut herself for the first time. “I had a morbid curiosity to see what it felt like”she said. Her depression increased as the years went by, and really went from bad to worse. Tattoos and needles, blades relieved her agony.
Amy was her own person. “When l get self-destructive l just need to spend time with Dad” -Amy. She thought she needed her father,not doctors, to help her overcome the problems in her life. One of her best friends was druggie and Kate Moss’ ex, Pete Doherty. They reportedly regularly used heroin together.
“I don’t want to be a role model. I don’t care about any of this and l don’t have much of an opinion of myself. I don’t think people care about me. I made an album I’m proud of and that’s about it. I write songs because I’m messed in the head and need to get something good out of something bad. I thought ‘I’m going to die if l don’t write down the way l feel. I’m going to do myself in'” -Amy Winehouse.
“There are no influences in my life; l don’t listen to anyone…….” -Amy Winehouse ….except for her bloody inner child.
Amy’s body was sending out warning signals. But she didn’t listen, even to her doctors. She was coughing up blood, had constant migraines and bladder infections. Her doctors warned her that she will ‘die in a year’. Her parents Janis and Mitch ,begged her to give up her dangerous lifestyle. “Amy is in denial all the time. She probably feels trapped; her body is trapping her” said her mother. Amy was terrified when her doctors told her that she’s fast approaching the point of no return. But it wasn’t enough to make her take stock and start working on her addictions or change her life. Her body was running on fumes and finally gave out. She was a walking time bomb. Amy was constantly taxing her body’s resources and didn’t do anything to help it cope with the abuse she was putting it through for years.
She suffered from severe vitamin deficiencies. She survived on only 800 calories a day, and drank at least two bottles of spirits daily and was still taking drugs. Her body finally failed her. Her 30 a day smoking habit did nothing good for her chest infection. But despite coughing up blood every morning, Amy refused to give up her smoking habit. Her entire body packed it up and called it a day.
Amy’s music, her means of self-expression, constantly mentions alcohol and drugs as ways for the pop singer to cope with her heartbreak. And her most poignant line ,one that hints at her lack of self-worth, sends chills up my spine: ‘You know that I’m no good…..’ Amy needed to realize she was worth saving. People wanted her to be alive.