Yearns for love? – Pine
Lies in your hand? – Palm
Remains after a fire? – Ash
Is found at the seaside? – Beech
Needs deodorant? – Stinkwood
Is spick and span? – Spruce
My wife is………
…a rare find, says an archaeologist
…in a class of her own, says a teacher
…one in a million, says a statistician
…out of this world, says an astronaut
How Are You?
Traffic officer: Fine
Property developer: Losing ground
Weightlifter: Bearing up
Mountaineer: On top of the world
AWB Member: All right
Gym instructor : Fit
Athlete: Keeping pace
Bank robber: Holding up
Tennis stars: Aces
Social butterflies : Clubs
Gardeners : Spades
Jewellers : Diamonds
Putting Them In Their Place:
He puts the “rat” in “ingratitude”
She puts the “tank” in “cantankerous “
She puts the “mess” in “domestic “
He puts the “ox” in “obnoxious “
He travelled through his days at a hundred smiles per hour
Her feelings shattered like fine glass.
He pulled his thoughts over his ears so as not to hear.
She laughed, and the shadows departed.
He collected his minutes on a shelf of years.
She liked to steep herself in tea and reflection.